Group Lifestyle Glossary — Every Term, Plainly Explained

Plain definitions, no euphemism and no sales pitch. If you heard a word and did not want to ask, it is here.

The umbrella terms

ENM (ethical non-monogamy) — the umbrella for every relationship style where more than one partner is open and agreed to by everyone involved. "Ethical" means informed, not secret.
Polyamory — multiple ongoing romantic relationships. The emphasis is on relationships, not encounters.
Swinging — established couples exchanging partners with other couples. This is not what ZAVOS is. Our members are independent individuals, not couples trading.
Open relationship — one primary relationship plus agreed outside sex. Rules vary enormously between couples; nothing is standard.
Solo poly — non-monogamous by default, without building toward a primary partnership.

Group sex — three or more people, no further implication about who or how.
Threesome — three people. The most common entry point into everything on this page.
Gangbang — one person at the centre with several others, on terms that person sets in advance. In organized communities the centre decides who, how many, and what is off the table; everyone else agrees beforehand.
Orgy — a larger gathering where multiple encounters happen in the same space, not one arranged scene.
Play party — an organized event where sex may happen but is never the entry fee. Most of the night is social.
Potluck party — an event where everyone brings food or drink and costs are split evenly. The norm in non-profit communities, where nobody may profit from attendance.
Happening bar — a Japanese venue category: a bar with a separate area where patrons may engage with each other. A commercial business, not a community.

Risk grade — an event's stated ceiling for barrier use, announced with the invitation so nobody negotiates under pressure in the room.
Barrier use — condoms, gloves, dams. "Barrier throughout" is the standard at lower risk grades.
STI panel — a multi-infection test, typically covering HIV, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhoea, hepatitis B and C, and others. See our [testing guide](/guides/sti-testing-guide).
Window period — the gap between exposure and when a test can detect an infection. Why "I tested last week" is not the same as "I am negative today".
PrEP — pre-exposure prophylaxis, medication that prevents HIV infection. Does not protect against other infections.
Signal / wristband — a visible marker of what someone is currently open to, so consent can be read across a room without an unwanted conversation. An invitation to ask, never a blanket yes.

Negotiation — agreeing what will and will not happen, in advance, while everyone is calm and sober.
Hard limit — something a person will not do under any circumstances. Crossing one is not a mistake; in organized communities it means permanent expulsion.
Soft limit — something a person might do in the right conditions. Requires a fresh yes each time.
Safeword — a word that stops everything immediately, chosen because it would not be said by accident.
Aftercare — the attention people give each other once an encounter ends. Not optional, and not only for intense scenes.
Enthusiastic consent — the standard that a yes must be active. Silence, hesitation, and intoxication are not consent.

Host — the person who organizes an event, sets its terms, and stays clear-headed enough to watch the room.
Screening — checking who a prospective member is before they are admitted, so the room is made of people who agreed to the same rules.
Nickname culture — no real names, no jobs, no personal questions. Standard in anonymity-first communities.
Non-profit rule — no money changes hands for participation. Once it does, the event is legally something else entirely.

[How group meetups work](/guides/group-meetups) · [Group sex safety](/guides/group-sex-safety) · [Your first orgy](/guides/first-orgy)
Read the [Manifesto](/manifesto), then apply in your city — or [found one](/apply-leader).